Dear Graham, Months 31, 32, 33, 34 and 35 (Part 1)

(After finishing this entire post, I realized it was way too long to hold anyone’s attention. So just consider this first of a two part series.)

Dear Graham,

Yes, I am aware that this is five months of letters. And yes, I am aware that this will likely be a long post.

But, I have two really good reasons for both.

1.       You are going to be a big brother.

2.       We now live in Florida.

It’s amazing how 13 words can summarize an inordinate amount of change, work, excitement, exhaustion, worry, and hopefulness. And did I mention exhaustion?

Before we get too far ahead of ourselves, let’s get started where we stopped off in your last monthly letters.

Month 31

For being a short month, February was a full one for us. For starters, I had to teach you the words, “I’m going to be a big brother.” Which is exactly how you told your daddy the news that our family would be expanding by one.

Other (huge! incredible! exciting!) news for the month is that you officially were potty trained. While you certainly are proud of each time you “pee pee in the potty”, your mommy and daddy are so, so much more so. You sport a cute collection of underwear featuring Lightening McQueen, Elmo and the characters from Toy Story, although you ask to wear your Lightening ones almost every day.

Valentine’s Day this year was even more fun as you now know more and more of the characters that adorn the various valentines you received. You also discovered that some valentines are accompanied by candy, which you had a good time enjoying.

You didn’t get the memo that Christmas isn’t celebrated year-round, so your movie of choice continued to be The Polar Express and one morning when I was getting ready for work and you were waking up in your crib I heard you singing Jingle Bells to yourself over the monitor. Speaking of Polar Express, there are a few scenes in the movie that you don’t necessarily appreciate, but instead of asking me to turn it off or fast forward, you cover your eyes with your little hands and every once in a while you’ll spread your fingers wide enough to see if that part is over. It’s precious and endearing all at the same time.

Also in February, we went to a “Touch the Truck” event in The Woodlands. It essentially was a gathering of all your favorite things: buses, garbage trucks, a helicopter, a fire truck, ambulance, a monster truck and more. We spent lots of time walking from vehicle to vehicle and getting on each, until you found the ICE Truck. You see, the ICE Truck had lots of computers onboard, with a small little holding cell in the back. You could care less for everything about this truck, except for the fact that the ICE agents had put cartoons on one of the computers. So you wanted to sit right there in front of the computer and watch the cartoons, despite the many other kids and parents who were walking through the truck to get the tour. I finally distracted you enough to get off the truck, and we made sure to stay far away from that truck during the rest of our time there.

In what is seemingly a routine thing to do, we also got your hair cut this month. We take you to a place that has videos to watch and where you sit in an airplane during your actual haircut. While that makes you sit still during the haircut, what really drives you to want to go there is the fact that they have a train table. And you get to play it before and after your haircut. This apparently made such an impression on you that you now know where the hair salon is located (which unfortunately for me is right by the Target we frequent) and you ask to go to it anytime we pass it. When I tell you that you don’t need another haircut yet,  you respond with saying, “But I do need one, momma. My hair is long.”

Month 32

March brings some of the nicest weather we experience in Houston during the year, so we spent much of the month outside. You continue to love to play with your water table, but you’ve now turned it into a ramp for your matchbox cars to slide down on in the water.  You also spent a lot of time in your jump house this month, and you continue to want to have mommy or daddy jump with you. This would ordinarily not be a problem for your mom, but seeing as how my morning sickness peaked at its worst in March, about the last thing I wanted to be doing was jumping up and down.

So, we compensated with lots of other fun activities, like play-dough, St. Patrick’s Day crafts and helping mommy make green smoothies, which is something you love to drink without realizing the health benefits simply because they are your favorite color.

With March in Houston comes the rodeo, a tradition that’s unlike any other. Normally we mark the rodeo by actually going to the rodeo and watching one of the many country music concerts, but this year we took the kid-friendly route and took you to the rodeo for the first time. We knew you would love the many animals, and we were a bit unsure about how you would do on the rides. Spoiler alert: you loved them all.

We started the day off early before the crowds hit and you got to see all of the animals you cared to see. They also had a petting zoo area and you were a bit shy with the very boisterous goats, who apparently are very used to being fed. Once you realized that you could hold your hand out for them to eat right out of, you got the hang of it very quickly. When we were leaving the goats you saw what you called a “carousel” but in all actuality was the pony rides. We went to go wait in line for you to ride the pony and you asked about 1 million times to get on one right now. You had ridden a pony at Charlie’s birthday party about six months earlier and still were talking of the experience, so it was definitely something you were excited to do again. When it was finally your turn, you rode like such a big boy and had a smile on your face the entire time.

Next came the rides. You were tall enough for many of them, and you walked from ride to ride picking out which one you wanted to go on next. We would pay, buckle you in, and wave good-bye as we watched from the approved distance behind the gates. And once the ride would start, you would have a smile on your face the entire time.  Apparently though, you had too much of a good time and didn’t want to leave when it was time to go. So we went from being that family with an adorable 2-year-old who loved the animals and rides to that family with a screaming 2-year-old as we pushed you in your stroller out of the parks. Good times in the life of a toddler.

At the end of the month, we flew to Chicago for a quick Easter weekend trip to meet your cousin Nikolas for the first time and to participate in his baptism. It had been awhile since you had seen all of your cousins and you were excited to play with Emelie and Christopher.

As always, you loved the airplane ride and everything associated with going to the airport. Your schedule, however, was pretty thrown off with flying during naps and late evenings. On Saturday, the baptism was performed at an Easter vigil service that evening, which meant we didn’t get home until after 10:00 that night. Once we got you in bed, we thought you would sleep well, but instead you were up at 4:00 a.m. (yes, that ugly hour does exist) and ready to celebrate the Easter bunny coming. No amount of coaxing could get you to go back to sleep.

Once we finally got to a decent hour where the rest of the house awoke, we went downstairs in search of what the Easter bunny had left overnight. You liked combing through your basket, although you really cared less for hunting for Easter eggs or eating any of the candy contained inside those eggs. Your cousins (minus Nikolas) made up for your lack of excitement by helping you find the eggs.

Thankfully you (and mommy and daddy) took a long nap before it was time to pack up and fly home the evening of Easter. Despite being tired, you were great on the plane watching Polar Express (on Easter).

Stay tuned for part 2…

Dear Graham, 30 Months

Dear Graham,

During your 30th month it hit me that you’re truly a little boy and not even really a toddler anymore. I can’t say it was one thing that made me think this; but rather a collection of traits, words and actions that combined in front of me to somehow create a little boy. An incredibly sweet, smart, little boy. 

 Christmas extended into your 30th month a bit as you received a Christmas package from your Aunt Kristen, Uncle Rush and cousins. The package contained the movie The Polar Express and as soon as you opened it you wanted to watch it. I had intentionally not shown it to you during Christmas because I thought you might have been a bit young, but there was no turning back now! It was a Friday night and your daddy was flying, so we made a big soft bed on the floor and watched The Polar Express together. You. Loved. It. You didn’t move or get up to play or even really talk. And on nearly every day that followed, you wanted to watch “the train movie.”

Basically every weekend during the month we set up your jump house and you love to spend time jumping in it, but only if mommy or daddy are jumping with you. One day we were jumping together and you saw a ladybug on the side of the jump house. You were so intrigued by the ladybug and immediately said, “I have to tell daddy.” “I have to tell daddy” is pretty much your response to anything that’s neat or different or just plain interesting to you. You ran inside and got daddy and the two of you caught the ladybug and set it free in the grass. 

Over the long MLK weekend we flew to Florida as a family and your mommy and daddy canoed 20 miles and camped two nights with your Uncle Sean and Sam while your grandma watched you. Despite asking for mommy and daddy a few times, you were wonderful for your grandma. Your great-grandma Cahalan was also in Tampa, so your grandpa stayed with her to help and you got to spend lots of time with them as well. Proving that you’re never too young to manipulate a grandma, when she took you shopping at Target, she let you pick out a toy. And, of course, you picked a train. Well, having just one toy apparently wasn’t enough. So you told grandma that you needed one for the other hand too. And, she actually believed you and let you pick out another toy!

One day while in Florida, we pretty much created what ended up being Graham’s dream day. It started with a trip to Uncle Sean’s fire station so you could explore the fire truck. You loved it, except for the fact that “it didn’t go.” From there, we headed to the beach. Even though it was cold and a bit windy, you loved running through the sand and touching the water with daddy. After lunch we hit up the mall where you rode on your first indoor mall train. To top off the trip to the mall, Sam even took you to the Disney store to buy Lightening and Mater cars and then to the mall playground. Yes, malls like this only exist in Florida as they don’t have anything like that here. (*wink*)

 
I mentioned in your last letter about you asking daddy to “fix” things, but it was really taken to a whole new level this month. Your school is right outside of our neighborhood and on the way home we happen pass an office building that has fountains out front. Every day you exclaim about the “mountains” and I respond, every day, with “Yes, there are the fountains.” Well, one day the fountains weren’t on, and so you said, “The mountains are broken. Daddy will have to fix them.” Your tone was as matter of fact as if daddy could go right in and fix those fountains. He appreciates your unwavering belief of his abilities.

Another cute word exchange that I take total and prideful credit for comes to Gatorade. We don’t often have juice at home, simply because I think you get enough of it as school and so the drink offerings at home are either milk or water. I always buy several Gatorades for your daddy and somehow you picked up on the fact that they looked like juice and you wanted some and you even knew what to call it. Except you didn’t ask for Gatorade. Instead, you asked for Renegade, also known as Florida State’s horse’s name. I would much rather you call the drink Renegade than Gatorade, a name that is representative of the school at which it was invented, so I happily poured you a cup of Renegade to enjoy.

Love,

Mommy  

Dear Graham, 29 Months

Dear Graham,

December was all about Christmas and you couldn’t have been happier to celebrate those 31 days (yes, even the days after Christmas). In late November we went through the painstaking process of buying a Christmas tree with your daddy and you loved running around the tree lot. Up and down the rows of trees we ran while your daddy singlehandedly inspected each one for a pine needle that might have been out of place. Once the tree was home and in place, we put you down for a nap and did most of the decorating while you napped. This meant you woke up to the wondrous glory of a decorated Christmas tree and the phrase “your eyes lit up” literally happened in front of us.

“There’s a bell, momma!” “There’s a snowman, momma!” “There’s a train, momma!” you exclaimed as you went from ornament to ornament. Then, you were surprised again when we set up the train that ran around the base of the tree. Every morning during the month of December involved you “driving” the train before we went out the door for school.

Your daddy and I had bets on if you would like Santa this year, and your first attempt occurred when Santa paid a visit to your school. When I picked you up that afternoon, I asked your teacher how the big visit went. She said she didn’t know as they took groups of kids at separate times and she stayed in the classroom, so I proceeded to ask you if you had fun when seeing Santa or if you cried. You told me you cried, and I silently congratulated myself on winning the bet. Then, when we were leaving the school the teacher at the front desk said you won the prize for seeing Santa as you ran right to the front of the line and got up on his lap and smiled away. Silently, I cursed your daddy for being right.

During the third weekend in December your daddy had a long overnight in Huntsville, AL that required him to be there for about 32 hours. The stars aligned and there were open seats on the departing and returning flights, so you and I went along with your daddy. It was the first time you have flown on an airplane that your daddy was flying and you got to go into the cockpit with daddy before we departed and you loved it. Unfortunately the weather didn’t cooperate with us as much as the flights did so we had to spend more time in the hotel than we would have liked. During that time, we were on the bed playing as a family and you started giggling. We began asking you, “Who’s got the giggles?” and you would say, “I’s got the giggles.” Over and over, which resulted in your daddy and me having the giggles as well. It is one of those memories that is forever etched in my brain.

 

Your language really exploded in December and the concepts and thoughts you put together continually surprise me. Your pronouns, like saying I’s got the giggles, are a bit off but you’re too cute to correct. For example, when saying that daddy has to fix something, you’ll note: “Him has to fix it.” Or when talking about your friends at school you’ll say “Them are nice.”

We flew to Florida for Christmas and you got lots of family time in. You were really good for the trip, with the exception of taking naps. You simply didn’t want to take them. One day we watching you on the monitor and noticed you had taken all of your clothes off except your diaper and threw them out of your crib. Apparently you were doing anything you could think of to stay awake.

Following making cookies, lots of singing of jingle bells, and church on Christmas Eve, you came out on Christmas morning and were amazed to see a Thomas the Train set that Santa left for you. You were not amazed by the fact that the cookies we left for Santa were gone. When we told you that Santa must have eaten the cookies, you simply responded, “No.” Despite our best convincing, you did not think that Santa ate those cookies. You were showered with lots of fun gifts (including your own jump house!) but your best reaction came from a gift your great-Pooter and Karen gave you, which was a remote controlled Thomas. When you opened it you started jumping up and down in excitement and couldn’t wait to use it (which didn’t bode well for the delay in battery installation).  

 

When we arrived back home, one morning on the way to school you noticed that the Christmas lights weren’t on anymore. And so I tried to explain to you that Christmas was over and that we would have to wait until next Christmas to put lights up again.

To which you replied, “I want to do it again.”

Love,

Mommy

Dear Graham, 28 Months

Dear Graham,

In a month that reminds us to be thankful for our blessings, you continued to give us so much to be thankful for. We tried to explain the concept of Thanksgiving to you by saying it was a day where we said thank you for the things that made you happy. And I would then ask what made you happy. And you would say trains, toys, mommy, daddy, Miss Chelsea (your teacher) and occasionally random responses like whatever food you were eating at the time. While I don’t think you totally “got it,” I can say that you did really grasp the concept of saying thank you this month.

 
We have long been working with you on saying please and thank you, but you advanced to head of the class this month. Your grandma came from Florida and stayed a week in mid-November. In typical grandma fashion, she brought you a few toys. Not only did you thank her then, but you continued to say “thank you grandma” throughout her visit, at times that were random and wonderfully precious.

During grandma’s visit we went to Hermann Park and rode the train. Despite it being our first truly chilly day in Houston, you loved it. In fact, we had to wait a bit for the train to return to the depot and each time you heard the train’s whistle you would stop, cup your hand to your ear, and exclaim that you “heard it!”

Another highlight of grandma’s visit that was enjoyed by you but was truly appreciated by mommy was her willingness to wake up with you in the morning. You would climb “on the bed” with her and watch Baby Einstein episodes on her Kindle. In fact, on the morning I was trying to let your grandma sleep in, you were unwavering in your persistence to go and wake her up, and knowing that she is a grandma, I let you go in for those morning cuddles.

You started to show an interest in going “pee pee in the potty” this month, likely from seeing other kids go at school. That or you know that you get a candy corn if you go. Don’t ask me why I ever started using candy corn as your treat. This reward system meant I had to find whatever remaining candy corn was left over from Halloween and stash it in our pantry. What you probably didn’t know is that your mommy’s love of candy corn is slightly obsessive. Apparently the only thing that can keep me from eating an entire bag of it is the fear that I may run out of it and then what ever will I reward you with for potty training? #parentingworriesthataren’treallyworries

You continued to like watching football with your mommy and daddy and one night after I put you down for bed I looked at the monitor to realize that you were signing and doing the war chant in your crib. By yourself. In the dark. It was one of my proudest moments as your mommy.

Love,
Mommy

Dear Graham, In the Wake of Tragedy

Dear Graham,
This isn't a normal one of your monthly letters. Instead it's one that is about a life experience that I hope you never have to endure, and yet I know you will. It's one of grief for your fellow humans, raw sadness and such emotional, disappointed despair.

While you may never read about this in a history book like you will Pearl Harbor or September 11, today at least 20 children were murdered in a mass school shooting. This is nothing a two-year old could comprehend. In fact, it's nothing your 32-year-old mommy can comprehend.

So, why do I write you about such a horrific event?

It's because it's so easy to take this event and think it defines us. It's because we can be so quick to harness the negative and believe that it is our future. It's because it is so horrific that it's hard to take its senselessness and believe that it's just that: senseless.

I write to tell you that this is not how you have to choose for your world to be defined. As I rubbed your back in your crib tonight with tears rolling off my cheeks and onto your blanket, I have such hope for you.  Just like one person can cause an event that can bring a nation to its knees like we have today, another one person can be a beacon of hope, joy and love.

In light of something as horrific as we are experiencing today, it's easy to think one person can't possibly make enough of a difference to compensate for this type of destruction. And maybe that's true. But while one person can't, 10 people can. Or 1,000 people can. Or 1 million people can. And together, in that unity of service, compassion and respect for our fellow human beings, positive things can happen.

The future can be bright.

I write to you to ask you to be one of those 10. Or 1,000. Or 1 million. Because the good works of one can multiply in ways you never believed possible and send ripples of blessings through a society that is in need of that hope.

Love,
Mommy

Dear Graham, 27 months (plus one day)

Dear Graham,
Technically, your 27th month ended one day shy of Halloween, but I can't post all of the pictures leading up to Halloween and not Halloween day itself.

Like a page out of a storybook, October involved all things fall-related, including pumpkins, fall festivals, farms, costumes and, of course, trick or treating. And you loved it all. Seeing the excitement through your eyes made the month so much fun, except for those few moments at your fall festival when you became deathly afraid of another little boy wearing a Hulk costume. Apparently you loved all of October except the scary masks.

We started the month with a long weekend in Florida so your mommy could throw one of her best friends a baby shower. Our flight was delayed for nearly two hours before taking off, and you could not understand why you couldn’t get on a plane. Right now. It didn’t matter which plane or where it was going. You just wanted on it. And with your speaking abilities only continuing to improve, I heard about how you wanted to get on the airplane about 1,000 times. When we were finally on the plane, you were great at flying and did really well staying in your own seat the entire time. While in Florida you entertained everyone, from your Auntie Shann who took you to the zoo where you fed the giraffes to your Uncle Troy who you would call for when he wasn’t in the room.

Also during the month, we managed to cram in not one, not two, but three trips to three separate farms. For the little boy who sings “Old Macdonald Had a Farm” nonstop, this was pure bliss for you. The first trip involved a pumpkin patch at a Christmas tree farm. While you loved riding on the hay ride, you pretty much could care less about posing next to some pumpkins. The farm was conveniently located next to a municipal airport, so you spent much of your time watching airplanes take off and land. Little did you know that after the farm, we headed to that airport to eat in their little café, which features lots of windows for you to watch planes through.

 

The next weekend featured a trip to Dewberry Farms, where you jumped (on a bounce house), played (on a playground), petted (animals in the petting zoo), rode (a little train) and ran around until your heart was content. By the time we went to pose with some pumpkins at the end of the visit, you wanted no part of sitting with an orange spherical object when there was so much other fun to be had. 

On your third and final trip to a farm in October, you went for a birthday party that involved really seeing the animals up close and even riding on a pony. When you said you wanted to ride a pony, I had visions of us waiting in line only to have you change your mind once it was your turn. However, you surprised me in not only getting right on it, but not wanting to get off of it when your time was done. Now at home when we read your farm book, each time we come to the page with horses and ponies you talk about how you rode the pony at Charlie’s birthday. It clearly was a memorable experience. 

You were a cowboy for your third Halloween and this was really the first year that you experienced trick-or-treating, even though you had no clue that you received candy at each house (in fact, you denied the single piece of candy we were going to let you have after trick-or-treating and then you never asked about it again). We went with neighborhood friends who range in age from three to six. But you were not going to let being the youngest slow you down. You would run with them in your cowboy boots, making sure not to fall behind. And they would help you open your candy bag and get to and from each house. You would yell “yee-haw” when asked what a cowboy says. And you kept your cowboy hat on all night long.

During your 27^th month, we really learned how much more you can comprehend, which never ceases to surprise me. You respond much better to knowing what a situation will be like in advance, so I spend a lot of time telling you about what we’re going to do, or experience. It also means that you get a lot of “five more minutes” warnings before it’s time to leave a situation or take a bath or go to bed, because it makes transitions so much easier.

Not everything about parenting is so easy, especially when you are so strong-willed (a trait that I think will eventually serve you well). On a day filled with those special moments that only a two-year old could create, it was finally your bedtime. I offered to sing you a song after prayers and chose Jesus Loves Me. On this particular night after a long day the word “no” coming out of your mouth frequently, when I got to the chorus and sang “Yes, Jesus loves me,” you promptly said “no.” And then I would repeat it in the chorus, to which you said “no” again. And it played out this way through the entire song.

On this one particular night, I don’t think I was ever so excited to say good-night and pour myself a large glass of “I-survived-a-two-year-old-today” wine.

Love,

Mommy